Because from my Okie point of view some of this sounds a little high, but if you are in some place like CA then it’s pretty close to average for your basics.

Let the old debts alone as long as they aren’t hollering at you. As DR says, “don’t poke the bear”.

You make too much money to get your student loan put into forbearance. Whose student loan is it? Yours, your husbands, or a child? If it is your husband’s then it is not your bill, he needs to make that payment himself since he’s not paying anything else. I figure, however, it’s for the child that is no longer living at home. Did the child take out loans too? If not, could they perhaps pay some on the loan each month. After all it was their education not yours.

What is the loan for may I ask?

My suggestion, lay this in front of your husband and say “the kids and bills are half yours. I need you to start paying your half.” If he refuses to, then you need to decide what is truly best for you and the children, because you are feeding him, clothing him and all the other stuff I mentioned earlier. Your money will go a lot further if you aren’t doing that. Plain and simple.
It’s time for him to man up.